TIME.

So many people run for the train
Disheveled and breathless and desperate,
Complaining of lateness for whatever cannot begin
At a destination they have yet to be in
Whereas I walk my own pace
And in doing so
Cultivate presently all that I know
Which is; Time is illusory,
The clock is a grid
As at odds with itself as the ego and id
And when I walk with purpose
I'm taking my time
Instructing the outcome events in my stride
Conscious that I am creating my world
Out of moments I carry with me and unfurl
Like I'm splattering paint on a bare, empty canvas
Or spilling light into unknowable dark
And more often than not I have witnessed
The train tracks flooding with sparks
At the moment my feet touch the boarding platform;
My arrival's departure from what is the norm
Allowing me freedom and fluidity
To float through the threshold with unparalleled ease
As I hear 'Stand clear of the closing doors, please'
I smirk to myself because I've learned the secret
While holding the handrail or finding a seat,
I'll get there when I'm meant to, I'm certain of this
If I'm clenching my jaw and squeezing my fists and
Fighting against that which has no existence
Outside the confines of my very own mind
Spinning and spitting and cursing my own time
It takes on a power in staunch opposition
To me til I'm on an impossible mission
And soon won't comply to my petty resistance
And when I need help offers little assistance
To what I imagine, in ill-conceived notion,
That chaos should grant me it's utter devotion
Why so many struggle and so many fail
To recognize rational reason. The rail
Is as fictional now as an old fairytale;
A journey enchanted and every detail
Of it's plot strung together like cars on a cable
Fabled to run on a structured timetable
But time doesn't tell you and me what to do-
You make time when you make time work for you

Conversations w/ my Better Self (Break Ur Mould)

I look at myself like I'm somebody else
And I'm observing this situation from somewhere faraway
And I talk to myself like I am somebody else
Somebody tellin me that it's gonna be alright
Somebody beggin me to fight the fight

I've been here before, when I was somebody else
And I might be back this way again
But by then I'll be someone new
And I'll give it another try cause that's all I can do
But if I come back I'm comin back for you

And I know you're gonna take me to that other place
Cause I see the invitation written on your face
Tho I can't make out all your letters
I believe I'm getting better now I know the way

And I'd like to think it's by your side where I belong
Cause I helped you write the lyrics to your siren song
And if you wanna get em all to know your name
And you're still losin at your own game
You might be playin wrong

I wanna blow on your dice before you throw your roll
I wanna send all your circuits into overload
I wanna spark your fuse then I wanna watch you explode
I wanna get out ya way so you could take your shot
And I'll bet your bottom dollar that it's all you got

I wanna break your silence and then I wanna break your mould

I wanna blow on your dice before you throw your roll
I wanna send all your circuits into overload
I wanna spark your fuse then I wanna watch you explode
I wanna get in your way so when you take your shot
You get all a this cause all of this is what you got I wanna break your silence I wanna break your silence I'm gonna break your silence And then I'm gonna break your mold

Arson

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All I remeber is the smell, the taste of embers in my face, the wall of yellow light, the crackle, the height, the song that I was humming as I detonate the night. Mmmm...
Well, I'm dancing in this cage and I bang my knees up and they bruise for days and I don't know why there's blood on the floor and I don't recall the sound of my own breath anymore. And I looked to you, and you showed me the sky and said, "I shot you down because you flew too high". And the key turned and my eyes burned and I heard the music play, Mmmm...
If there's a chance I could get away
It passed long before this song I sing today.
I can't fly, run, got no shotgun then I heard the voices say... 'Arson'
Mmmm...
Keep breathing into the flame. It isn't real, it's just a game and we're all gonna die anyway. Keep breathing with your face to the floor. It's only believing that you aren't you anymore.
I will not act or play stupid for fools, blind to the machine can't see we're just working tools while you use me to my full extent, while I say 'Please' and 'Thank You' and wonder where I went. And you can't take it. And you can't take it down. And you can't take this fire from me until I burn this shit to the ground.
All I remeber is the smell, the taste of embers in my face, the wall of yellow light, the crackle, the height, the song that I was humming as I detonate the night. Mmmm...

One Hell Of An Open Mic Night

(article excerpt. on Examiner.com!!!)  :) :) :)

...host Jason Liles singing an outstanding cover of The Black Crowes "Oh Josephine," with harmonizing vocals from Laurie Lehner. Lehner, who would also have a gorgeous, powerful solo set, will be filling in for Liles as host while he tours with his band.

In a perfect summary of the community feel, Lehner says, "It's like a Monday night on Broadway -- people come when they're not with their regular work, just to jam out with each other."

VIDEO- http://www.examiner.com/local-music-in-new-york/a-sample-of-hell-gate-social-s-open-mic-night-video

Continue reading on Examiner.com: One Hell of an Open Mic Night - New York Local Music | Examiner.comhttp://www.examiner.com/local-music-in-new-york/one-hell-of-an-open-mic#ixzz1L2rdEjXb

http://www.whyleaveastoria.com/profiles/blogs/when-musicians-dont-leave

KEANU by Laurie Lehner

I was out with my girls in the summer, after dark
We were uptown, the 70's, near Central Park
Friday night cocktails, cool breeze in the air
outside a trendy new lounge with a club downstairs

And it was cosmos and gossip amid Marlboro smoke
then a stranger leaned over as I was tellin' a joke
"You guys got a cigarette?" were the words he spoke
it was Keanu Reeves, sippin' on a Jack and Coke

And then we said, "Sure!"
And then he said, "So, what's the occasion?"
And we talked with Keanu a little bit more
And found ourselves tossing him cigarettes 'til a quarter to...
2, 3, 4!

Keanu, I need to sit here all night waitin' for you
to bum another smoke from me
Keanu, the time flew. It's been great, now it's late
but it was awful nice to hang with you

Then he held my hand in a lengthy embrace
And a sad, sad smile came across his face
And as he stood from his chair to wave goodbye
I could have sworn I saw a tear in Keanu's eye...

And then he said, "...Whoa"
And then he just started quoting Shakespeare
And we said, "Hey, Keanu, it'll be alright
Just imagine we're sittin' here next to you for the rest of the night"
'Cause, Keanu I'd love to sit here all night waitin for you
to bum another smoke from me
Keanu, how I love you
'Cause now you're so much more to me
than just 'that guy who starred in Speed'
Keanu...

-Laurie Lehner

ARSON

All I remeber is the smell, the taste of embers in my face, the wall of yellow light, the crackle, the height, the song that I was humming as I detonate the night. Mmmm...
Well, I'm dancing in this cage and I bang my knees up and they bruise for days and I don't know why there's blood on the floor and I don't recall the sound of my own breath anymore. And I looked to you, and you showed me the sky and said, "I shot you down because you flew too high". And the key turned and my eyes burned and I heard the music play, Mmmm...
If there's a chance I could get away
It passed long before this song I sing today. I can't fly, run, got no shotgun then I heard the voices say... 'Arson'
Mmmm...
'Just keep breathing', that's what I say. It isn't real, it's just a game and we're all gonna die anyway. Keep breathing with your face to the floor. It's only believing that you aren't you anymore.
I will not act or play stupid for fools, blind to the machine can't see their just working tools while you use me to my full extent, while I say 'Please' and 'Thank You' and wonder where I went. And you can't take it. And you can't take it down. And you can't take this fire from me until I burn this shit to the ground.
All I remeber is the smell, the taste of embers in my face, the wall of yellow light, the crackle, the height, the song that I was humming as I detonate the night. Mmmm...

'Live from the Bathroom' Sessions 2007

http://www.myspace.com/misslaurielehner

AS 4/23/07

4/23/07

A swirling aura of calm and light. Surrounding. This innate sense of quiet beauty. Private and intimate.  Incubating it until I'm ready to share it with the world as now it may be contaminated. Inevitabilities of that which is Universal, revealing themselves AS a secret whispered between two connected souls and, in understanding have always been one, presently acknowledge. AS a soft inviting beam of light rises of a dark place. AS a first meeting of eyes in a world where we do not see each other. The ultimate understanding. Acceptance. Approval. of everything I am. Clouded with self-doubt, these years of uncertainty absolved. AS. You kneel before the son of God asking only permission to celebrate Him. He places His palm upon your humble forehead and echoed in your mind you hear, as if hearing were for the first, Child, You Are Worthy. And you arise AS one filled with love, and power of mind, with soul enriched and so, with capability of hand. A freedom, a wisdom allowing purest accessibility to that which you have only dreamed could be. Imagined so. A state of being long awaited with a faith which betrays the skeptic.  With a truth which invalidates the jaded.  With such certain divination, which annihilates the cynic.  An all-devouring apocalyptic renaissance beginning within and spreading outward in concentric circles.  AS rippling kinesis bleeds illumination to the farthest reaches of the Universe and back again.

Road Trip to Mars 2008

My little prophet on guitar coming through must be millions of me's here for only one you so you waited and you weighed it and the heavier that it grew on your mind made you want to, made you wonder What if. Is this some kind of a rouse but you keep singing your blues to your brown haired, green eyed, seventh row muse Do you steal her aside no you just wave from your ride so if you meant what you said then i think that you lied Cause we were LIVE! from Here comma Here, USA where you just rolled in today so they can all scream while you're playing with my depth perception between here and the moon til the gravity lifts and when there's none left in the room I'll float upside down til my eyes fill with stars and the people around me drive their hybrid cars on my Road Trip to Mars you got me hitchin to Venus but I don't need their gasoline cuz it flows intravenous He found me in the stratosphere that you kept in between us now you look back down to earth to see me straddling his genius Inside your disaster and fighting to get just a little bit closer is not what I'm after. I've loved you from here but I'm here for the show,sir If you can't escape from the jaws of the image you had that you never proposed her It isn't my bad. Still I'm just a smiling face on a poster Strangely confused, she'll no longer excuse all the things you don't do despite the words that you choose to be the man that you are living light years apart in your fantasy lost and forsaken your art to me you all are the same cuz you'll all fuckin tease us but you all like to fuck and don't you all look like Jesus up there breaking our bread and bleeding our wine when your Bordeaux drips from the same vine as mine My little prophet on guitar coming through must be millions of me's here for only one you so you waited and you weighed it and the heavier that it grew on your mind made you want to, made you wonder What if. Is this some kind of a rouse But you'll keep singing your blues

Fate

You brought me to her house and we sat around with the crew
Yeah, you brought me to her house and went off and made music like you do
And she handed me a cup of water and I never knew
that she expected you to stay, cuz she thought she was with you

And how can I still be tormented by how you are and what you've done?
Why do I look around the room and see myself in every one
of the beautiful and dutiful girls who've sacrificed a soul
to the lost cause that is searching for your light in the blackest hole

Cuz all of us in love, and once in love, with you just wanna be
sure that what it is about you that we love will someday see
the sunlight someday when you emerge from underneath that weight
and I'll be standing in the back and smiling because it's fate

One day you meet a guy who takes your breath away from you
and you fall madly, and gladly, too
And you think that he's 'the one' and something's finally gonna work
and a year and a half later you're still finding out how wrong you were

So I brought me to her house and we sat around discussing you
Yeah I brought me to her house and wound up making music like we do
And the bigger picture here resides outside the frame of mind
that pits woman against woman for the sake of all mankind

Cuz all of us in love, and once in love, with you just wanna be
sure that what it is about you that we love will someday see
the sunlight someday when you emerge and I can hardly wait
to be standing in the back and smiling
or maybe I'll be dancing in the front and smiling at you
cuz I do believe it's fate

~by Laurie Lehner

Keys

I lived my life out one summer. I was born, I lived and I died.
He said, 'I'm the drummer'. And he took me for a ride.
I said, 'Where is this going?' He said, 'I just wanna hang'
I said, 'No, I meant your music' He said, 'I just wanna bang'

You set it up for what you lack
You hit the road and it hit you back

Dead of winter the air is frozen to my face
My cold heart melted when I saw him slap his bass
The only thing I had a handle on was holdin on to something of it's own
Why am I holding court in jest, playing second best to the successor of the throne?

So I threw off my crown and ran into the night
So I begged you a little, that's okay, right?

I showed you yourself, you showed me the door
Hey, that's okay, maybe you won the battle but, Im'a win the war
Was mid-November, fall. He was handsome. He was tall.
The people travel wide and far to hear him shred on his guitar.

Piano man, Baby please, don't take me home, just give me your keys...

~by Laurie Lehner

The Waterfall

When the boundaries of my world collapsed
Space expanded, time elapsed
and the matter and anti-matter shook
Now only she and I know how
how our mind altered the radio
And only you can see the real me but you don't look

The more I give it, the less I get it
So I just live it and let it all go
Nine years to the day before
What have I done? What is it for?
I must have learned here more than I've earned here
But I don't know

And maybe I can't make a dime
Maybe I don't even like this rhyme, you know
Honest work and honest words are so hard to find
And maybe I can't fall in line
But maybe I could show you a good time
Maybe I'll show you that there's no time
Let me blow your mind

Tell me it's 'Yes. I wanna do it.'
So I'm a mess, I'm working through it
Haven't we all been less than we wanna be?
Still baby it's you, who wins the glory, and me,
who can't even tell the story,
On the sidelines with the plot lines,
Too linear. I'm free.

See, I could watch but I won't view it
when I could just seep right into it
But I just can't seem to bring myself to do it, no
And I feel the weight of this inertia,
Not just a feeling when it hurts ya
It's a stop sign that you decline, go

When I met you a new world began
and it was written by your hand
And I didn't try to understand
I just gave you everything I had
I gave you love, I gave you space
Man, I gave the land on which I stand
Now I don't know this place
I have no ground at all
I am The Waterfall you chase
and I wanna rain over your body
while I'm dripping down your face

~by Laurie Lehner

*1st recording. Rough. A few days after i wrote it

I've Got Nothing 2009

I can make you think that you're the congruent equation
I can make you wanna be the one
I can make your mark, regard the writing on the wall
I can make you feel anything at all

I feel a slight reserve tonight to go to any detail
I hold the cards close to my chest
It's more or less the words, I guess, that help it sound peculiar
So I've heard, or so I've inferred and so I've deterred

But there's something in the air out there that gives a girl the feeling
She isn't gonna live forever long
And 'what ifs' only weaken you if the 'what' is unappealing
And what it is ain't never been wrong

See I have danced in the devil's fire
And I think he wishes he were more like you
Baby I have held the hand that held the hand of doom
And I was ten steps ahead before you walked in the room

Or I'm bluffing. And I've Got Nothing.
I don't have a clue and I can't tell the truth
Think I'm bluffing? It's all or nothing so
Throw 'em down and look around for the joker's goof
See, all you needed was a little proof

That panic-stricken look of shock enjoys your face as
you think about what you have seen
I can turn your red sevens into black Jacks or Kings or Aces
And you can win this one on me

I can make our stars collide, convince the sun to suicide
if I think the moon deserves her day
Got a way to make the mighty winds engage, the seas enrage
I can make it rain

Or I'm bluffing and I've Got Nothing
You can't see it with your eyes is it's only disguise
So I'm bluffing. If you feel nothing then
I don't know what to do to get through to you

Baby, you know I'm a fool and what I'm sayin isn't new but
You know I got it. And I got it all over you.

~by Laurie Lehner